By the owner of Nationwide Relocation Services.
My boyfriend advised it was best to keep quiet…for now. I’ll keep you posted.
28 Jun
Crank Caller
Around three a.m. this morning the ringing of the cell phone jarred me awake from a blissfully recuperative state of rest. Pissed but curious I disentangled myself from the warm and fuzzy goose down and grabbed the offending object that had been stowed in the suitcase and stared at the phone blankly until BLOCKED ID registered in my brain. I sleepily punched in the the passcode to my voicemail and placed the phone against my ear.
Sex noises.
Somebody (a male, obviously) was making sex noises over the phone.
However, it gets worse.
That somebody sounds exactly like my brother.
27 Jun
How to Find and Not Find a Mover
Just when I thought the stars were auspiciously aligned and everything was falling beautifully into place and Lunar Space Pumpkin and I would be jetting coast to coast at a blisteringly early hour Tuesday morning...the movers – those no good sons of a bitches – pull a no-show!
Cross Country Van Lines, a New Jersey based company contracted by the just-as-disreputable Nationwide Relocation Services, was due to arrive at noon in order to pack my boxes before the freight elevator became available at two p.m. They had exactly three hours to empty the apartment before we had to relinquish control of the garage to the next truck in line. There was no way around it.
I stressed to both the broker and the mover that it was imperative the truck arrive promptly because my lease ended that very day at six p.m. I also arranged for the electric and cable to be terminated sometime over the weekend and booked accommodations at a swanky hotel in my metro accessible neighborhood because it was pet friendly and I would be sans wheels (my car was getting shipped through an environmentally friendly freight carrier). I prepaid through Expedia in order to take advantage of the low room rates.
When the clock hit one and they failed to show I began to panic. The Old Man and I made several dogged attempts to track down the dispatcher for an update but instead of reaching a human we were sent straight to a voicemail. Some guy named Simon who spoke in a heavy accent (Eastern European? Israeli?) finally returned our call with the reassurance that they were on their way.
Well, “they” never arrived. When Simon tried to reschedule with the promise of being there on Monday, I more or less told them to fuck off and fired off a letter to Pamela Ling, the deceitful broker at Nationwide Relocation Services (company also known as movingcost.com), who all but vanished into thin air once she received our $779.85 deposit. Funny how she couldn’t be reached until I told her via email we were terminating our contract.
I immediately called the Old Man and urged him to cancel his credit card in case they tried to charge him for the full fee. And then I did what any reasonably intelligent person should have done in the first place – an internet search.
I.could.not.believe.what.I.was.reading.
One company has been slapped with numerous violations and both with complaints on a myriad of consumer websites. What’s the m.o. with companies like these? Frustrating the hell out of you so that you cancel your contract and forfeit the deposit. If you are unfortunate enough to have one of their contracted crooks handle your move, prepare to be extorted. They will eventually hold your goods hostage in some undisclosed storage room and double the fees owed because your items “weighed more than originally determined.” If they can’t shake you down they will threaten to sell all your items and – to add insult to injury, that is, if they haven’t literally roughed you up (some have threatened and/or actually inflicted bodily harm), they slap you with a storage fee!
We got taken but it could have been worse.
I scrambled to find a more reputable van line and arranged for Mayflower to arrive Thursday because it was the only day they – and the elevator – was available. Because of the negligence of the aforementioned companies, my boyfriend and I incurred a good deal of emotional trauma (the Old Man later revealed he thought he was going to have a heart attack) and a horrible loss of time and money. Monday night (my birthday night) will be spent hauling boxes into the apartment. I was forced to cancel my flight and extend my lease through next Friday at $81 a day. I am working with Expedia to see if the Westin will extend us a courtesy and refund all or part of the $300 we prepaid for the room or at least give us credit. I also lost money on the one night’s stay in Scottsdale booked for the evening of the 30th. As expected, Pamela Ling refuses to return our deposit for services not rendered “until she talks to someone higher up.” This has been an absolute fucking nightmare and I implore all of you to do your research and steer cleer of brokering companies and dodgy movers. These people are not only unethical they are potentially dangerous. Some allegedly have mob connections.
I’m in the process of compiling a modest list of links to help assist others in their move. I’m also working on a viral internet campaign to stop these people and their like-minded cohorts from swindling others.
Be safe out there. There are people with no conscience.
25 Jun
Because Cancer is Funny
Disgraceful. It takes a certain kind of person to make fun of cancer. It was just as disturbing to find out he’s a fellow water sign. Fucking Scorpios. I thought they loathed being in the limelight. He must be on the cusp or something.
22 Jun
Apartment Vs Apartment
At the very last minute I jumped at the opportunity to view another rental property (within the same management company) because of its primo location next to the heart of all the action in Old Town Scottsdale. Trendy clubs and restaurants, art galleries, live music near the waterfront, downtown Tempe (the Mill Ave District), downtown Phoenix, not to mention the convenience of having the airport within close proximity.
The rent is slightly higher (still not bad compared to Northern Virginia) and the apartments are underwhelming. Sure, it’s spacious, but it doesn’t have that – how do I put it? – zen vibe you get from my soon-to-be-residence (I’m going to be living in the kind of place that inspires wind chimes and miniature herb gardens). The community itself is small and large dogs are allowed (no, I’m not thinking Pumpkin could get eaten, I’m thinking of myself and dogs bark). The pool area and weight room basically suck. And parking? Forget garages. There are none That just means more poles jumping out at you. It’s also directly adjacent to…construction. And it feels way more suburban than the other complex which is twenty miles northeast.
But it’s all about location, right? My boyfriend wants me to stick to the original plan and concurred that booking a cheap hotel for those drunken nights out is a good strategy. In my case that could be costly.
I have until tomorrow to decide. What should I do?
22 Jun
Rental Car Blues
This trip was almost perfect until I side swiped a pole with my rental car (I wasn’t going to count the surreal late night hotel check-in). Backing out of the tightly packed lot of my new apartment rental headquarters, I veered towards the right and heard the most disconcerting noise – you know, something along the lines of BAM!
I sat there for a moment, more embarrassed than shocked, and directed my attention to the entrance of the rental office. Did anyone see? I wondered. I was more concerned with my image than the damage that might have occurred on the black Mazda 3.
Not bothering to get out because I just wasn’t ready to deal, I cruised along the highway for a good 20 miles until my bladder nagged at me to pull over and hit the loo at a fast food joint. I was forced to face the damage.
“Ok, here goes,” I say to myself, taking in a deep breath as I slide out of the driver’s side. I gingerly sneak a peek at the door.
“Oh, fuck me!” I gasp. It wasn’t good. It could have been worse but it could have also been way, way better. The scrapes and “bruises” had nothing on the massive dent that allowed me a narrow view of its…internal mechanisms. You could say the door was slightly ajar.
I call my insurance company to file a claim. Like, three days later. Rigor mortis on metal = rust.
“Yeah, someone hit me in the parking lot while I was shopping and away from the car,” I tell the nice lady on the phone.
I am relieved to be informed that my deductible will “only” be $200 (rather than $500) because it wasn’t my fault. And then I am instructed to file a police report.
“Well, you don’t have to but it would help your claim. We might or might not need it.”
Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck!
You know how lies go. You tell one, it spawns more. After much debate (and, surprisingly, a little bit of guilt), I hit redial and ‘fess up. The receptionist responds with a hearty laugh but the claims lady? She wasn’t so amused.
I hope Enterprise has a payment plan.
20 Jun
The Drive to Sedona
Now that I’ve found my new place [so surprisingly soon] I can finally relax until I fly out on Monday. The weather has been unseasonably cool which puts me in the mood to hike. I’ll be smearing on the 60+ sunblock and lugging my camera equipment to the picturesque and mystical Sedona and embarking on a mad photo expedition – another thing I’ve always wanted to do. Wish I had a better variety of lenses but I’ll just have to make do. Maybe I’ll sit or stand on one of those sacred vortexes and be cured of all my chronic stomach woes!
Life.is.good.
20 Jun
It’s Official
I have signed a six month lease on a WAY TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE 1200+ sq ft two bedroom/two bath apartment located in Northeast Phoenix. The community is young and trendy and the architecture is what is known as “Desert Deco.” Three pools, two jacuzzis, an exercise room overlooking the pool, business center, $5 yoga, sushi and pizza and hair salon ON THE PREMISES, all adjacent to a massive shopping center and movie theatre and conveniently located next to the highway!
My rent will be half of what I pay in Arlington and if I ever fancy getting a roommate, let’s just say I haven’t paid those kind of prices since my days of living in group houses. Even my pet rent will be plummeting from $50 to $15! And yes, dogs are allowed.
My father and stepmother confessed they are filled with envy. They both love the desert and will eventually retire in the Valley of the Sun. My old roommate is here, too, and I’ve been meeting new people through him.
But I’m not gone forever. I’ll be flying back and forth between Arizona and Virginia to visit my boyfriend and old friends. It’s just too bad I didn’t do this years ago when I had an insane surplus in the bank because this move ain’t gonna be cheap!
17 Jun
Haters
There are sick and arrogant people on the internet who thrive on spreading rumors and misinformation. They sit with their asses parked in front of a keyboard and pretend to be knowledgeable about subjects and scenarios they have never actually experienced because they no life. They heartlessly and artlessly pontificate and rant ad nauseam because they come from a place of ego and they’ll be damned if their ego is ever wrong.
Someone recently called me a “juice monkey” – in public and private via email. My boyfriend says it is so beneath me to address such lies because the people who tell them are not worthy of even a thought. They are mere gnats vying for attention and they will suck your blood and energy if that’s what it takes to get it. Bluntly put, they are jealous and intimidated. They don’t have the discipline to create the same results for themselves.
Well, I am not above getting a little dirty when needed and I will address what was said.
I take some offense to this false allegation although I am mostly amused. I feel more irritated than I do “hurt.” I worked hard for years and I worked hard naturally. Even upon visual examination your average “layman” can tell you that it is obviously not true. And if you’re not sure you should do some research before you go around falsely labeling people. I would love to see the physiques of these people who suffer from a bad case of corpulent mouth syndrome. How much you want to bet they would never say this stuff to your face because their courage is based on their anonymity?
Well, haters, let me tell you a few things. I am probably physically better looking than you, I’ve aged better than you, I’ve got more talent than you, I dress better than you, and I am better liked than you. Most important? I’ve got a good heart, in more ways that one (yeah, I am willing to bet my cholesterol is lower than yours, too).
So yeah, go fuck yourselves.
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