More ways to kill time at work my lovely little cubicle rats. Unleash the beast that is your stream of consciousness, all fatuous dreams of songwriting stardom can be reconciled here. Bong hit optional.

My first brilliant piece of lyric:

“You are a ho.”

Ouch! I got lectured for not using enough words? Um, ok. As succinct as it is, it does drive the point home. Actually, it wasn’t such a terribly romantic line to throw in a serenade [to myself]. Next:

“Making love on a rainy Sunday.”

Now that was really cool. Almost pretty. I think I heard Led Zeppelin in there somewhere.

“I fart in the shower.”

Almost as pretty as the previous one.

“I want to devour your flesh and sell your body on eBay.”

There is no word for eBay.

Leave it to me to find all the flaws.

A thanks to this bloke for helping me conceive of more ways to get sidetracked.