Baghdad Turns Cock Diesel

But perhaps the strangest sight was this: after the end of a grueling set, one of the buffest guys at the gym walked toward a window in a corner, pulled out a cigarette and lit up. After smoking it, he reached for a pair of dumbbells and started a new set.
More Nothing But Speedos in [...]

Mr Spock Does Fat Girls

Visually arresting imagery of larger bodies in motion. From Leonard Nimoy.
As I commented here, I don’t find this sort of figure aesthetically pleasing but kudos to Nimoy for adding a dimension of humanity to women who are often dismissed and dissed as lazy and undisciplined or used as part of a fetish feature. [...]

“You are Banned!”

“Practice Your Misogyny, Racism and/or Homophobia Elsewhere.”

Whoa! This morning I got into [what I assumed] a non hostile exchange with some ultra PC feminist because I respectfully disagreed with her take on a certain Halloween prop as “racist.” The slant du jour is that hanging a figure from a tree equates to [...]

Craggy Range Vineyards Wine & Dinner Feast

[Warning: The objects in this picture appear to be much larger than they really are]!
Screenwriters, Olympians, legendary restaurateurs, rock stars, and a close one with a Presidential candidate. And now - a kiwi winemaker! No, I’m not talking about some sordid little black book - rather my last two weeks at what I [...]

Gays Take Your Lifestyle Elsewhere

And leave eHarmony alone!
In fact, maybe I should sue these sites: gaylesbianintroductions.com, gayoptions.com, biggestgay.com, and gaycupid.com for discrimination against my (often questionable depending on what I drink that night) sexuality!
I’ve been wanting to write about this upon hearing of this ridiculous lawsuit but I got caught up in more pressing matters (such [...]

Paramours of Satan

There’s a certain level of angst for a universally attractive woman. More so if she is sexual by nature and uses it as a bargaining chip to secure men for her own needs. The rest of the population would collectively surmise that she is either dumb as a rock or a natural born predator. [...]

Hate is Not A Family Value

As you know the Old Man is a die hard Republican. This means I have to order not one but two copies of The Reagan Diaries - one for Father’s Day and the other for him as a belated birthday gift. Some might see this as a waste of $40 but I confess [...]

A Happy Date Story Pt I

The place: Mienyu
The wardrobe: A coral colored Bebe dress and gold mules.
The man: Strikingly gorgeous model type and Ashton Kutcher lookalike. Casual with gel coiffed hair and - gulp! tennis shoes?
Transportation: Taxi - driver non-hostile
Our first date almost got off to a disastrous start because

Revel In Your Divine Whore, Married Women!

Ladies!
Don’t want to find your dearly beloved husband’s work or personal number in some sensationally publicized forty-six pounds of cell phone records that happens to belong to the Beltway Madam or one of similar repute (or any Madam, for that matter)? Are you upset and frustrated when he neglects the garbage or he won’t scrub [...]

If You Want To Earn Your Man

You’ve got to learn your man!
“…her vagina is cold, she’s laying in bed at night playing with toys. Or she’s got a man beside her, he’s a good provider but he’s not hitting the walls and working the middle like that daaawg that she havin’ that sneaky sex with…”
I couldn’t resist lifting this little gem of a [...]

Guns Are For Pussies

 
Wouldn’t it be something if America pimped out and hailed the virtues of the long lost art of sword fighting?  No longer would you be subject to wannabe gang bangers bustin’ out lurid lyrics on their most recent gunfire exchange because a drug deal went south or some rival gang member crossed over into enemy territory [...]

The Sandow Awaits in Vegas

Just bought the VIP package for the 2007 Olympia weekend in Vegas!!!  I can’t say I feel completely ecstatic as it’s not ’til the end of September (sheesh, why do my vacations always fall around the dreaded monthly curse?  EVERY TIME!) but mentally, I am blown away by the prospect of seeing eight time Olympian winner Ronnie [...]

Tag, I’m It

Max, I am going to grab you by the ankles, turn you upside down and dip your head in…in…oh, I don’t know…dark red henna.  But Celluloid Cherry sounds like an adult film star name spawned by some crazy net generator and one quality that cannot be attributed to you is bad taste.
So I’ve been tagged by Max [...]

Film Adaptation of Hitman

FYI, I’m a serious video game junkie.  Shadowman will always be my hands down favorite while Hitman places a close second. 
Do you know why I hit the gym regularly?  Aside from aesthetic and health reasons?  Because it keeps me from smoking pot and gaming 24/7.  For real.  I used to take my home line off [...]

Is That A Fleshlight In Your Pocket?

Or are you just happy to see me?

As I eagerly await Anna Nicole Smith’s autopsy report, I bring you this.
WARNING: GRAPHIC LINK

Look, Boss, the Place! The Place!

In response to the throng of pervs out there who have a yen for Oriental objets d’art and who keep nagging me for the name of ”this place,” as mentioned in my last post: 
 “I will take you out to this place where you can hang with all the other guys with yellow fever and see hot Asian women slink around in [...]

Anna Nicole Judge Cited For Pot In Park

You know, I was really hoping it was the outlandish Judge Seidlin who was pinched with his dope on because that would almost certainly explain his bizarre antics in that spectacle of a courtroom he presided over.
HOLLYWOOD, Fla. - A judge who had a secondary role in the recent Anna Nicole Smith proceedings was charged [...]

Dangerous Liaisons

I am ashamed to say “his” name or refer to him by the less than subtle nickname that I tend to ascribe to those I gossip about but I can’t stop thinking about him. We have been corresponding like crazy - text messages, IM, emails, all the usual methods of modern communication - and [...]

Fakin’ the Big O

Restaurant “O,” that is.
Maestro is a world class dining establishment and among its legions of fans and an extensive internet search, I must be the only one who does not ”get it.”  It is a colorful but severe departure from the norm and last night’s culinary exhibitions nearly drove me to the brink of insanity. Maybe it was the all the duck [...]

The Song that Makes Me Cry

I bet you didn’t know I had it in me.  Even Stiletto Girl gets sentimental and weepy at times and not just from chopping onions and the pesky vapors that irritate my eyes.   I listened to three recordings of this song on my iPod and watched numerous versions of it on You Tube.  When I figure [...]

Hollywood Madam Spills the Beans

Click pic for link!

“I have never heard of this woman and don’t know why she would accuse me of something like this,” Lasorda said in a statement issued by his attorney, Tony Capozzola. “But if she prints these lies, I intend to sue.”

Willis’ attorney, Marty Singer, said: “The story is a complete fabrication. (Willis) doesn’t [...]

Who Wants to Be A Millionaire?

I do and I don’t necessarily want to marry rich, either.  I want to be the one holding all the credit cards.
Why do I have this urge, this need, this longing?  It all started with the Saks catalogue I was flipping through late last night.  The dresses!  The shoes!  Those sickeningly thin models dripping with the jewels!  [...]

“Look Ma, No Berries!”

What would compel someone to wear this tee?

The Final Wipe Tee-Shirt

Let everyone know how you feel with a Final Wipe T-Shirt! T-Shirt: Heavy 100% cotton, pre-shrunk and durable. Double needle sleeve and bottom hems. Either Hanes or Fruit of the Loom. (Only available in final wipe blue.) Availability: In Stock, will ship in 2-3 business [...]

Judge Seidlin, Your 15 Minutes Are Finito!

 
This judge is out of his f*cking mind and a disgrace to the bench!  He should be disbarred and stripped of his robe!  The way he pontificates ad nauseum in that Yankee accent as though he’s sittin’ on a porch kickin’ back with a glass of lemonade on a warm summer day while Anna Nicole’s rapidly deteriorating [...]

More Anna Nicole Wackiness - Stoned on Video!

 
From TMZ: (click picture for video)
A stunning video shows a barely functional Anna Nicole Smith, stammering and stuttering, as Howard K. Stern rhapsodizes about how much money the clip will be worth.
The tape, which aired Monday night on Greta Van Susteren’s show on FOX News Channel, shows an eight-month pregnant Smith, her face painted like [...]

Cabbie Runs Down Students

 
Religious Argument Leaves One Hospitalized
POSTED: 5:01 pm CST February 18, 2007
UPDATED: 7:12 pm CST February 18, 2007

NASHVILLE, Tenn. — A local cab driver allegedly tried to run over two customers after a fight over religion became heated. The incident happened early Sunday morning on the Vanderbilt campus and left one man hospitalized and a cab [...]

It’s Always the Good Looking Ones

TMZ, my favorite gossip site, reports:
“CNN’s Anderson Cooper put himself on the auction block to benefit the Bailey House, which helps people with AIDS. A lunch date with the news anchor was sold to British bachelor Oliver Hicks for $21,000.”
You know AC’s sexual orientation has been under speculation for some time. I don’t think a date [...]

Britney Goes Bald

Click pic for story.
I’m way too sore to write this evening.  I think I’ll go rent a movie and booze it up as usual.  I should hit the shower because I smell pretty disgusting but sometimes I like to do the anti-glamour thing and grunge out.
I shouldn’t blog when drinking because I end up looking back [...]

Howard K. Stern the Jew

 
Looking at the search terms that help generate traffic to my site should elicit a few Beavis and Butthead-esque snickers.  Those endowed with a poor sense of humor would probably roll their eyes in disgust.  Aside from all the bonafide perverts out there  (swimsuit mishaps?  eating cooze?  huge pole grind against pole dancing) and those in dire need of an [...]

Notes from Valentine’s Day

 
The only thing that really impressed me about last night’s gastronomic excursion to Teatro Goldoni is its mesmerizing interior and liberal use of bold color.  The balefule glare of the Venetian masks that hung conspicuously on the walls did little to distract from the lively ambience of the room.  Or maybe I’m just in my element.  As the website states:
“In November [...]